An Open Letter to Matthias

Dear Matthias,

You stress me out more than you know.  Lately, for instance, you have been interested in potty training, which is great except that you are constantly running around naked, because you think that taking off your pants means you must take off your top as well.  This morning you wanted to play with the faucet and because you know Mommy doesn't like you playing with the faucet, you locked yourself in the bathroom with the water running.  Mommy was frantic, trying unsuccessfully to unlock the door from the outside with various screwdrivers, calling Daddy for sympathy and then the landlord for help, when you decided you had enough, unlocked the door, and walked out like nothing happened.  You run into the street any chance you get and start running faster when Mommy comes after you; Mommy who is seven months pregnant, by the way.  You pop open the window screen and climb out onto the porch, lick rocks and chalkboards out of curiosity, and wherever we are, running, climbing, grabbing...Mommy is tired.

But when I think about what the world must look like to you, I see beauty in your wonder.  Everything is fascinating.  Everything is exciting.  Everything is an adventure and you just don't want to miss out.  Everywhere you find treasure, everywhere you discover, everywhere you marvel, and for that, my heart gives thanks.  And as you sleep, finally still, I know behind that sweetest face, you dream what must be the most extraordinary dreams.  So keep dreaming, my son, for I know your dreams are more wondrous than mine could ever be.  Your dreams are precious to me as you are my precious gift from God.

As your mommy, I promise to always protect you, always clean you up, never scold you for being the way you are, never hinder you from being the way God created you to be; to teach you but also learn from you, to lead you to where you can run, to do everything in my power to make your dreams come true, and always, always to love you.

Matthias, Mommy is tired.  But you are perfect.  I wouldn't have it any other way.


Love,
Mommy